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Writer's pictureJuanita Fouche

Choosing Pleasure Over Pain: My Journey to Softness

Updated: Sep 28



There are two kinds of courage: One asks us to brace ourselves, suit up in invisible armor, and push through the tension. The other whispers for us to strip down, feel the discomfort, and let life flow with softness and patience, without needing to control every outcome.


But here’s a question for you—are you wearing armor right now?


Take a moment. As you read this, notice your body. Where are you holding tension? Are your shoulders tight from sitting behind a desk too long? Is your neck aching from holding stress? Have you been working double shifts with no real rest, your body crying out for a break? Maybe you’ve trained too hard, or maybe the chaos of life has you contracting inward, without even realizing it.


Feel that tension, that contraction. That’s your body’s way of wearing armor—trying to protect you, trying to push through. But what if, just for a moment, you let it go? What if, instead of fighting the tension, you leaned into it with softness? What if you allowed yourself to surrender and trust that even in letting go, you are strong?


I’m learning that real courage doesn’t always look like the fight—it often looks like surrender. And while that might sound counterintuitive, it’s in those moments of release that I’m finding my true power. Because when we’re not constantly trying to force life into place, we create space for life to flow.


Part of my process has been taking ownership of my own patterns—where I’ve held on too tight, where I’ve refused to soften. That accountability has been uncomfortable, but it’s been necessary. I’ve had to be honest about the ways I’ve armored myself against vulnerability, against the unknown, even when I thought I was being brave.


As I write this from my new life by the sea, I’m feeling it—this expansion. This softness. And yes, it’s still unfamiliar, but it’s a deliberate choice I make. It’s liberating. Thank Goddess. Let's rock & roll. It’s a radical act to choose relaxation over contraction, peace over pressure, and self-love over pushing too hard.


And this is where The Sexiness of Slow comes in. I’ve learned that when we slow down, we can access deeper pleasure—whether in our bodies or in our lives. This is a practice I’m sharing in my new program, designed to help you reconnect with your body, rewire your nervous system, and show up in the world with more ease and flow.


For the men on a journey of personal empowerment, I’m also excited to offer Stronger & Harder, a program for men who want to master their energy, performance, and pleasure. It’s about more than just physicality—it’s about emotional and spiritual strength.


For those ready to dive deep into a transformational experience, the ISTA South Africa training is happening soon—a chance to immerse yourself in powerful teachings and tap into your true self.


So, take a breath. Notice where you’ve been wearing armor today. And maybe, just maybe, let yourself soften a little. Let yourself slow down.


Because life? It’s too short for tight shoulders, knotted tummies, and days that feel like they’re squeezing you. And far too beautiful to keep wearing armor when there’s sunshine to bask in and waves to listen to.





With love from the beach,

Yoni

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